AofA's Hot To Trot Talking Points
Every Friday
It’s great to be back to sharing the discussion points in Advantages of Age.
There is so much going on around death and dying and choices and getting to know what they are. This is from the Modern Mortician and is very moving.
‘When her cancer came back, she was really clear about what she wanted this time. No hospital room. No machines. No rotating strangers. She wanted to be at home. In her own bed. Window open. Wind in the trees. Her people nearby.
As things changed, her family stayed close. Someone was always sitting with her taking turns reading, brushing her hair, holding her hand when talking felt like too much. When she died, it wasn’t dramatic. It was quiet. One breath… then stillness. The whole room just felt calm.
Later, her daughter warmed water and brought washcloths. The family washed her together. Slow. Careful. Tender. They dressed her in her favorite blue silk pajamas. Exactly how she wanted it. No chemicals. No rush. No strangers taking over.
People came by all day. Food in their hands. Stories. Tears. Some laughter, too. They sat with her, touched her hand, said what they needed to say.
When it was time, they laid out her shroud handmade by Sanctum Shrouds and gathered around her again. Everyone placed a rose. One by one. The whole room smelled like a garden.
The next morning, they carried her out to the family van. No hearse. No casket showroom moment. Just sunlight, trees, bees buzzing somewhere nearby.
At the green burial cemetery, she was laid into the forest wrapped in her shroud, roses still around her. Moss. Soil. Roots. Back to the place she loved.
Her husband said something I’ll never forget while we placed the last rose on the grave: “No fuss. Just the forest telling her story.”
#homefuneral #greenburial #naturalburial #sanctumshrouds’
This looks so great. A talk about punk and Liverpool by Penny Kiley who has written a book about her experiences. This is on Tuesday March 10th at the Walthamstow Book Club.
Great to hear that the independent book shop and poetry prescriber, Poetry Pharmacy is opening its doors in York. As this statement from them says - so good when so many independent book shops are closing. Opens March 6th.
‘At a time when independent bookshops are often framed as vulnerable in the shadow of big chains, the Poetry Pharmacy is attempting to rewrite the script. Opening directly opposite Waterstones on Coney Street in York is a bold move, a statement of confidence in being something entirely different. With its apothecary-style setting, prescriptions of poetry, pill bottles and cabinets of verse, we offer a sense of theatre and ritual that transforms browsing into an experience. Its clear specialism in poetry, words and wellbeing invites readers to engage emotionally as well as intellectually. We hope that, when rooted in care, craft and imagination, this experiment is not a risk but a compelling alternative. We hope you think so too! ‘
This was a discussion but we decided that actually Over-65s benefit in numerous ways from social media. Okay not exclusive social media without actually seeing people but it keeps people who have mobility issues in contact with others, and there are very useful older community networks on social media where people can feel connected and seen. Oh like Advantages of Age, for instance.
We’re always fascinated by co-housing communities and Marmalade Lane is an intergenerational one in Cambridge. They have made a film which really allows you to see what members get out of it.
On April 26th at the Alma Tavern Theatre in Bristol at 5pm, there is going to be a very special conversation on Love and Tantra between best-selling author of Help Me and Love Me, Marianne Power and the UK’s top Tantra Teacher, Jan Day. The last one at the Vagina Museum in London sold out.
‘5pm Sunday - A Special Conversation Event with Jan Day & Marianne Power
A riveting, open, honest and glorious discourse about what is possible in terms of love, sexuality and relationships from two fascinating women.
Jan Day is the UK’s top Tantra teacher while Marianne Power is a best-selling author of Love Me! One Woman’s Search for a Different Happy Ever After. She’s also done a lot of Jan’s Tantra work.
What a wonderful cauldron of knowledge and curiosity. Marianne will ask the questions and be very much part of the conversation. Marianne will talk about her own experiences on Jan’s workshops while Jan will talk about what informs her teaching in terms of her life.Approx running time 1 hour 30 mins (no interval)’